Aslaug's Axe Shed

Tadahhh! I have finally discovered the brilliance that is Windows 7. How come? Because I have a new computer. My old machine would’ve died if I tried to install Windows 7, no question about it. The old machine had been -expanded- to 1.5 gigs of ram … this new one has 6. The old one had 160 gigs of storage space. This one has a terrabyte. Overall, the new machine is better in eeeeevery way, and I am extremely happy to have it

Moreover, I have some news to share with you. Something I heard yesterday, which very nearly knocked me to the floor. Something someone tried to do for me … to help me … out of the goodness of their hearts, without me knowing about it until ten years later.

I found out about this yesterday, and my head is still ringing.

Some of you know PART of this story already, so if you are one of them, I ask you to bear with me as I rehash the whole thing. The bit at the end is new, however, since it was new to me too.

I’ve spoken at length about my time in Århus. I’ve told you about how sick I was, how fractured my mind was and so on. This is not about it … or at least only in circumspect ways. When I lived in Århus, I was one monumental failure in almost every way. Parts of it, as I’ve mentioned, are blank. I can’t remember periods of time or what I did or what happened to me, but I do remember a lot.

One of the people that sticks out like a beacon is Bennedikte. I’ve mentioned her before, but here we go again. Bennedikte was a very dear friend I had back then. Someone who … frankly … put up with my sickness because she’s a good person, but she’s also someone whose friendship I tested severely at times, and whom I know I hurt on a number of occasions. I can’t say how much I regret having done that.

Over the last few years, I’ve met her a few times, always at the local roleplaying events here in Nibe, where she’s been a guest-storyteller several times. Last time was just over a month ago, in March. I was happy to see her again, as she had been absent for a couple of events, for various reasons. So … I had time to chat with her and it was really nice to hear from her. Lots of things had happened in the meantime. She’s been knighted (quite literally, she was called to court while eight month pregnant to receive her knighthood) and she’s had another child, bringing her total up to two

She’s got a great career going as a radiologist and she’s got a fantastic husband with whom she just bought a new house. Oh, and she designs clothes, did I forget that? She’s just sold her first collection of children’s clothing to be sold in Norway, apparently

Awesome woman … probably the most impressive human being I know on so many levels. And while we haven’t seen each other much over the last ten years, she’s never stopped being my friend. Something … I didn’t always understand. Nor did I understand how serious that friendship was to -her-.

That is … until yesterday.

When I moved away from Århus in the late nineties, it was a catastrophic, panic-ridden move. I just had to get away from all the failure and all the mistakes and all the horrible sickness that I wallowed around in. I had to get away RIGHT THEN AND THERE, and fortunately, my parents helped me find a place in Aalborg to move back to on -extremely- short notice.

I called my dad on a thursday and said “dad, I have to get out of here … now!”

I was in my new home on Sunday.

That’s how fast it went.

But when I left, I also left behind a couple of unpaid bills. I owed a guy called Thomas an amount of money. It wasn’t a lot. Some hundreds of kroner … under a thousand as I recall, probably in the vicinity of 600 to 700 kroner. This debt was for food. I spent a lot of time at the place which Thomas and some of his friends shared, and they shared the foodbill too. With me living on their couch 2 weeks in a row at times without going home (I’m not going to tell you how unsavory that could get, but hey, I was sick …) I also had to contribute equally to the food. Fine with me, but I was in arears when I left.

I did contact Thomas to tell him “Look, I’m broke. I haven’t got money to buy salt for an egg but I’ll have it in a few months, half a year at most when my birthday comes and I’ll pay you back then.”

Thomas said that was fine with him. As long as I paid him with any money I got for my birthday, he had no gripe. I mean, he was a student too and could use the money but I thought he was my friend so I left for Aalborg thinking nothing more of it. I left so fast that most of my roleplaying stuff was at Thomas’s place. Rulebooks, boardgames, tabletop games and tabletop minuatures worth about five thousand kroner in all. Mostly because of the BOATLOAD of miniatures, of which about half were no longer in production and consequently quite valuable.

Half a year later, I did get money for my birthday, and I contacted Thomas immediately saying “Hey, I have your money. I’m sending it tomorrow!”

His answer was a puzzled “What money? You don’t owe me anything. I took the rulebooks, miniatures and games you left behind as payment in full.”

I was absolutely, utterly floored. Totally devastated.

I thought the man was my -friend-. And he had basically stolen my entire collection over a triffle of money.

Including pieces that I had an emotional attachment to, particularly the miniatures I had spent hundreds of hours painting.

He hung up on me. I haven’t spoken to him since. Last year, his wife tried to contact me and we spoke briefly via facebook. This … situation … wasn’t mentioned, as far as I recall. Nor should it be. It’s in the past, it’s ancient history, and I suppose it was a dire lesson, learned at considerable expense but also one I’ve taken to heart.

So far, so good. This part of the story some of you already know.

Then yesterday, I sent Bennedikte an SMS. Having finally gotten her phonenumber at the roleplaying event last month, I had told her then “I’ll call and we’ll arrange for some thing I can drop by and we can catch up properly!”

She was fine with this, and after a month, I felt it was about high time I finally made good on my promise but since it was during working hours, I didn’t want to risk calling her at an awkward moment. So instead, I sent an SMS, asking if I could come and visit next Saturday. I figured with a schedule as packed full as Bennedikte’s, she’d probably call me three days after the proposed date, half out of breath and panicky “Oh my goodness, I forgot to call!”-like and then we’d be able to set up a day where I could drop by -then-

That would’ve been fine. I mean, the woman is INSANELY busy with all manner of things, for goodness sake.

But she called yesterday evening, just as my good friend Emil was helping me get the new computer set up. I was so surprised, but I immediately answered the phone (duh) and thus started a forty five minute chitterwagging …

Afterwards, I told Emil we used to do that practically every day. Emil just eyeballed me and went “Uhuh? And you think you’re going to have trouble reconnecting with this woman? Jeez, you sounded like she called only yesterday!”

I guess he’s right. It was just like old times.

It felt fantastic. But what was most fantastic was something Bennedikte told me. You see, after I left Århus, that was when my world truly fractured. Over the course of a single month, I retired from the world and lost contact with practically everyone. I didn’t talk to anyone. I didn’t see anyone. Old and VERY dear friendships were put on hiatus and many of them have never come out of it. But Bennedikte told me that later … some time later … she learned of what Thomas had done with the rulebooks and minuatures. After all, she can only have learned of this after several months, at a time where I hadn’t spoken to her for a GOOD while already, -probably- not until -after- I spoke to Thomas following my birthday half a year after moving back to Aalborg. In theory, she could’ve spoken to him before that, but because of other events that aren’t relevant, I believe her conversation with Thomas didn’t take place until somewhere between a year and a half to two years after I moved away from Århus. The main reason for that is that by that time, Bennedikte and Carsten had become a couple.

Anyway, what she told me was that she had learned of Thomas’ stunt, taking “payment in full” in goods worth several times what I owed him. She was -outraged-. And so was Carsten.

PARTICULARLY since Thomas and his girlfriend Lina (formerly one of Bennedikte’s old friends), owed both Bennedikte and Carsten money. They did, in fact, owe each of them an amount of money roughly the same as what I owed Thomas when I moved away from Århus.

And both Bennedikte and Carsten resorted to getting back all my stuff as payment. Not for themselves, but as Bennedikte said on the phone “we’d have found out where you lived and we’d have given you all your stuff back.”

I was nearly knocked off my feet. I knew Carsten in advance. He was a big name in the roleplaying community back then (still is, in many ways) but he was not a close friend. Bennedikte was, but I had caused her a considerable amount of discomfort and even pain with my behavior in Århus.

And they still tried to get my stuff back for me, because they felt what Thomas had done was just plain wrong. Of course, Thomas and Lina refused to hand it back over, claiming “Oh, you can’t have that. It’s part of our collection now”.

But they -tried-. For me. And for ten years, I didn’t know of it.

Ten years is a long time to be unaware of a great kindness done to you by other people, and I’ve even MET Bennedikte in the meantime. Yet she never told me about this before. I guess she never felt the time was right.

Naturally, I thanked her many, many times for the attempt. It’s not the outward value of the stuff anymore. I mean, it’s been over ten years. It was more the hurtfulness of it all, and Bennedikte and her husband tried to set it right. They didn’t have to, but they tried anyway.

When I go to visit them next saturday, I can guarantee you all I’ll remember to say a -proper- thank you. To both of them.

It’s good to know there are people like them around.